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Monday, April 22nd, 2013
3:37 am
Did you know i have never really read the scriptures,
It has never occurred to me that the knowledge to live life properly comes from these words,
I so much want to to believe that my actions are sole consequence of my my decisions,
I never really questioned that too hard.

For the lions share of my life, i have listened to words;
Listening and understanding are two separate beasts.
My family and their tradition drive me and like love i make leaps of blind faith,
At my heart i can be quite the scepticist, i do question most things afront me.

I live in a rich and vibrant world, one vain enough to poke fun at the archaic routines of bygone years,
One so lost in consumer ideals that it morally and financially bankrupt.

Still the views of my peers and of society matter little, what i am often concerned with is my relationship with what i deem God.

There a two things i consider worthy of time and consideration, the woman i love and god.

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Thursday, November 15th, 2012
1:53 am
Look can you hear it?

Bang, Bang, Bang
They are blowing our money on another submarine
Another useless deterrent for those firm faced fanatics!

Clunk, Clunk, Clunk
The cost of human lives promised a steady job
Another useless promise from another multinational facade

Drip, Drip, Drip
Eek, Eek, Eek
Fizz, Fizz, Fizz

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Tuesday, November 13th, 2012
4:35 am
When i am tried,
My mind fills with electric anticipation,
A flash of realization,
Or an overture of deep thought,
I think it is best to invoke this altered state,
For it makes me feel so alive.

I think perhaps i can produce the greatness,
My soul has long lusted,
Is it just a fallacy,
That i have some greater purpose?
I need to believe,
Have faith, courage,
It is so hard feeling alone.

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Saturday, November 3rd, 2012
6:07 am - Jane
Oh, sweet sultana
Your beauty is inestimable
Your patience admirable
When i think upon thee
I want to be superior

The verity is i know not who i am
Half man half patrician
I am the lunacy of the ages
I think you as a reverie
Or part of heavens tapestry

I am penitant for what i said
That tears would flow from your cherub head
Know that i am but a tortured soul
Who has forgotten how to love and play
You still helped me through my rainy days

If i had the chance to love you
I would no longer question
My rocky principles
A sign clearer than water
That god exists and is merciful

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Thursday, November 1st, 2012
4:08 am
I was once a sponge,
Now, i'm just all wet.

In the town of the hurdled ford,
In the Lord's house,
I knelt down,
As I watched a matriarch of mine,
Put to rest.

This woman so tough and unyielding,
So courteous and congenial,
I sat ashamed in the pews,
Incomposed, inebraited,
Full of guilt.

No one really knows what time is,
An oscillation of the hyperfine?
All i can perceive is contrition,
The long planck length to my heart,
As i struggle with my grief.

These intellectualized words a guise,
For the moments that i missed,
In family, friends and God,
We exist forever.
I love you granny. Time to dry up. See you again.

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Friday, August 26th, 2011
4:32 pm
A dream that haunts as if laced with purpose, like a thousand failed friendships; Lingering on your consciousness like bitter-sweet temptation.
The randomness of it all, discordant and unfunctional; means little for the mind who finds absolution in logic. Those tiny shards of understanding, waiting to be reformed into a mirror to the heavens or gateway t3o the soul. Is it possible that everything you went through was meaningless, no matter how vivid; that the fullfillment seeked is unquantifiable and is bestowed and not found?

Living on this watery mass in awe of the beauty all around, i choose to sit with drowning men in hopes they would be found. When i try to leave them in hopes of saving myself i find myself rooted to the bitterness i've felt. This strange preoccupation to help others, to try and throw a lifeline to those that would hang themselves upon a broken moral.

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Sunday, April 3rd, 2011
5:08 am - black gold
Desert life is sparse and out of this sparsity comes great intensity.

In the vast arid landscapes of Saudi Arabia, a metamorphosis is occurring. A country less than 100 years old is having a diverse effect on life around the world. The history of country is full of struggle and turmoil, two years before the country was officially founded an American geologist found oil reserves within the territory.

It was not until after the War had ended, that drilling would commence. The financial benefits to the country would prove a catalyst in building industry and infrastructure through the 1960's and 70's.

Saudi Arabia, is what is described as an absolute monarchy. Meaning they are ruled by royal line. Only in 1992, what is declared that the Monarchs' would be sully to Islamic Law.
In 1973 Saudi Arabia was producing such a vast amount of oil, they were able to put severe political pressure on America. During the Yom Kippur war, America made the decision to resupply Israel with arms. This led to an oil embargo by OAPEC, (organisation of arab petroleum exporting countries + Egypt, Syria and Tunisia) the embargo lasted about 5 months but was severe enough to change the world.

The resultant effect was OPEC members independently decided to use this leverage to boost their own incomes by adjusting the price of world oil. Today OPEC members produce about 42% of crude oil and trade about 58% of it. Saudi Arabia possesses about 25% of world petroleum reserves and 20% of oil.

Recent events such as the 9/11 incident, (where supposedly 15 of 19 hijackers where Saudi)
increased American support for Israel, the war on terror and the declaration that America will look to produce more resources at home have put a great strain on relations between the two countries.

Perhaps more importantly the emergence of India and China through this global recession. China is expected to take over as the worlds largest consumer of oil soon, unlike America they have a stand offish approach in acquiring it too. China are unlikely to provoke the Muslim world and if anything will become increasing trade partners (like wise India). Chinese influence in the area is highlighted dare i say it by the amount of new chinese restaurants opening in major cities. Indian influence is highlighted by the worlds' biggest oil refinery being build with Saudi money just on the Pakistan border.

Increased trade with China will be at the detriment of the US, who rely increasingly heavily on Chinese imports. If they can buy the quality refined stuff cheaper from India or Saudi Arabia cheaper, they will.

The recent Libyan crisis has had a big affect on oil. Libya produce some of the best grade oil in the world called extra light at 0.07 carbon emissions, this stuff is gold dust. The Saudi state owned company Aramco is now knocking out replacements at 0.5 still classified extra light.

Perhaps a bigger concern for Saudi Arabia is the on going division between Sh-ia and Sunni muslims. After deploying troops in Bahrain they have invoked the wrath of the Iranian government. An uprising within Saudi Arabia could halt oil production and send the whole world into turmoil.

Water is one thing, Saffron quite another but oil is black and dirty.

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Saturday, April 2nd, 2011
6:01 am
"Observe what happens when sunbeams are admitted into a building and shed light on its shadowy places. You will see a multitude of tiny particles mingling in a multitude of ways... their dancing is an actual indication of underlying movements of matter that are hidden from our sight... It originates with the atoms which move of themselves [i.e., spontaneously]. Then those small compound bodies that are least removed from the impetus of the atoms are set in motion by the impact of their invisible blows and in turn cannon against slightly larger bodies. So the movement mounts up from the atoms and gradually emerges to the level of our senses, so that those bodies are in motion that we see in sunbeams, moved by blows that remain invisible."

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Monday, March 21st, 2011
1:31 am
take a look at the world; the ten biggest earthquakes ever recorded have been in the last ten years. Is this a testament to better surveliance and recording technology? or is the world actually crumbling at our feet?

Wars are rife in the world and egyptian uprising is counterbalanced by liberian sanctions. The world at war. Will we ever learn to work together and overcomb our differences? Can my God be bigger than your god?

Does anyone even want that?

You vs Me until its Me vs Me then ME vs ....

Can humanity save itself? i dont know, i kind of think we cant. Its not an individual battle its a widespead socialogical battlefield. Most people simply do not have the lifestyle to think of others so readily; so how then to convince them that their own personal gain should be sacrificed for an overall gain for society(humanity)? Highlighted always the offspring, their perceived better life, however when its a choice of you or your unborn children; for most there is no choice.

Should we aspire to be better creatures?
Is it possible to make people care more for others?

We have so many easier choices shoved down our throats.

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Saturday, September 25th, 2010
2:14 am - New Tunes!!
I heard some new records:

Belle and Sebastian release their new album write about love next month, ive been lucky enough to get a copy; and i really like it.

A move into more easy listening poppier songs which perhaps reflect their advancing years, the satrical wit from earlier releases is dead and this is a much more straight forward record. Melancholic and touching on more (straightforward adult themes eg. money, family) Why norah jones is on the record i do not know, there are a few sketchy moments, however i think this is one of their best efforts. 8/10

check out : I didnt see it coming + I can see your future.

And Squarepusher has also has new record out next month, once again moving toward a more accessible sound. Long gone are the days of harcore gabba, we are left with meanderings into funky bass and vocoded singing. The whole thing reeks of 80's music electrofied, its still sounds fresh and its still relavent. Check out a few tracks below.

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Sunday, June 6th, 2010
2:57 pm

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2:18 pm
Out of war and conquest has grown the perversion of moral vision that refuses to see the wrong in the obtainment of something for nothing. It is for the invading host to seize upon the resources of the invaded, thus sustaining itself; and in the event of conquering success to thereafter impose taxation as a means of popular exploitation that is to remain permanant and uninteruptted.

In a peaceful existence there is neither fame nor glory. A great name enduringly engraved on a memorial tablet of bronze or stone is not to be dug from the earth like a bushel of wheat. The glory of enduring fame has been and remains for men who organise great armies or business, engage in carnage or exploitation, murderous destruction, shedding seas of human blood and oceans of tears.

Men who employ wit and energy in business and war; men having the power to tax the tiller of the soil and thus despoil him, look upon his vocation with aversion, and treat him with contemptuous disregard.

Educationally war and its objects became the exciting cause which
turned men of superior intelligence from agriculture and made militancy as an organized profession possible. These societies we breed and the stucture we endear and live by in the west, are nought but the culmination of organized professionals and their thirst for power.

But war is clearly incompatible with what might be reasonably -expected of people who declare themselves intelligent and to be devoted
to pursuits in harmony with ethical and moral requirements of a civilization having basis in a religion of love and a belief that all men are brothers.

Are the declarations and professions of professing Christians to be accepted as true, or as sheer declamation and pretense?

Did we see the end of passive resistance when tibet fell to the historically peacefull Chinese? The very same nation that decided to build a wall so vast it could be seen from space in the name of peace. Was it our failing western ideals that corrupted this nation?

We sit and gaze longingly at our television sets feeding of the fiction hencewith ensued upon us, dream idly of peace and wishing to win that lottery that will allow us to view from afar the moral stagnation of our brothers and sisters, as the quartermasters arm them to fight battles we do not understand.

Our voices of peace are heard and dismissed. To prevent war or so they say, we must wage it?! There is no room for farmers these days, you must be accounted for and make sure your accounts are feeding our war machines. The same G7 group of machines that sit at tables and flatly deny others the chance to the same. Hypocrisy.. the wonderful world of.

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Saturday, June 5th, 2010
3:48 pm

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Tuesday, May 18th, 2010
1:05 pm - You think too much.
A German short with english subs. The other dragon.

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12:13 pm - Does anyone ever think they are the only person on earth?
The Quiet Earth -

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Tuesday, May 11th, 2010
9:03 pm
For him
no actual state of affairs is unalterably ordained,
but every fresh situation is a call to a higher
realization of the world's ethical purpose, for
which, indeed, the mechanical uniformity of
Nature provides the most eilective means. For
him, too, history acquires a new meaning, its
larger canvas showing the progress of man to consist
in the fulfilment of his peculiar function, and
manifesting the sway, not of a blind destiny, but
of Providence.

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Sunday, May 9th, 2010
4:40 pm - Infernal Affairs
Deferred to this remission room
Waiting on my own
There is a clock ticking
And I can not tell if it is above me or below me
Where ever it may be it is unnecessarily loud
I can now hear the footsteps of my inquistor
Bounding down the hall
Polished heavy shoes are thumping on the floor
With alarming synchronicity; thud...thud...thud...
I hear the sonority escalate as i enter ataxia

He enters the room and i take the seat inferred
Who are you? He asks in a monotone voice
What is it that you want?
What do you see when you look in the mirror?
Do you understand the connotation?

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Wednesday, March 24th, 2010
7:30 pm - Marchs' band - the same old songs
Well the last few weeks have been a bit of spectacle.

India sign several nuclear contracts with Russia, as Pakistan announced a gas pipeline with Iran.

French prostitutes march against the legalisation of brothels in France, claiming they would no longer to be able to work for themselves.. eew.

The economic crisis has severly hit Greece, who are now looking for IMF funding or an agreed european solution. Diplomatic relations between Germany and France have weakened. There are claims that Germany is persuing selfish and nationalistic policies.

An internet capaign has taken to the streets of Rome, Italy. The campaign is designed to take down Silvio Berlusconi from power. Perhaps Silvio will try and befriend the female activists on facebook!

Obama asks American congress for 3 billion for the Haiti relief fund, Haiti has recently said it will take 11.5 billion to rebuild. I doubt the congress will grant the full amount, however never before has the Haitian motto been so applicable: L'Union Fait La Force - unity creates strength. I sincerely hope the people of Haiti and the world unite to help these people and all the others in need.

Nato troops face quandry in Afganistan, on whether or not to kill the rife opium trade. Stating that if crops are destroyed they will lose the 'hearts and minds' of people (mostly farmers). Oh spoken like a true Vietnam veteran.

Annie Lennox, of Eurythmics fame was in tears this week after making humanitarian outbursts on Israel and the Pope. Against further agression on Palestine and the use of contraceptives. You could see how genuinely shaken she was after a news reader read her a letter in the Israeli press, labelling her anti-semetic. She was probably shunned by half of Glasgow on the contraceptive situation.. The humanitarian stance is not the faint hearted Annie and house prices in London arent getting much cheaper!

The Israeli prime minister is finding life very difficult in America! With the Americans unwilling to approve the building of settlements closer to Palestine controlled areas, or the sea.

Indeed there were further complications for Israel.

The Israeli government will not be allowed to replace the senior Mossad station chief expelled from London over the cloning of British passports used in the assassination of a Hamas commander unless it offers a public assurance that UK citizens' documents will never be used again for clandestine operations.

King Abdullah of Jordan, told the world this week that "I have warned that continued attacks on Jerusalem and its holy sites will ignite the entire region. Jerusalem has a special place in the hearts of Palestinians, Jordanians, Arabs and Muslims,” When asked of the possibility of Jordan providing a security role in the West bank, the King dismissed the idea and said Jordan would have no role apart from helping secure a independent Palestinian state.

The King in the classical solution/treat style said:
"I think that the entire world is facing a moment of truth: either we achieve real, tangible and quick progress to resolve the conflict on the basis of the two-state solution within a comprehensive regional context which the Arab Peace Initiative offers; or we enter a new cycle of conflict and violence, and the whole world will pay the price."

With the dead sea drying up possibly within 50 years, this area of world faces an enormous test. The UN like the League of Nations before them have failed in their role of trying to broker and maintain peace. Simply put they have not the resources or backing to do so, however if something is not done and soon; the land and cultures may end up as dead as the sea.

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Wednesday, January 27th, 2010
10:19 pm - 2009
Well its been an uneventful year. Or at least none of the things i have done have really excited me this year, i always feel like that.

So its my birthday soon and things are going to have to change, i will be happy if
a) i stop drinking so much
b) i stop smoking
c) finally do some aid work
d) move somewhere beside a beach

2009, saw a great financial recession. The poor are inevitably getting poorer and even the rich have been slightly affected. Icelandic banks seemed to light the touch paper. Still they say things have to get worse before they get better. I sincerely hope they do.

There was temporary cease fire in the gaza strip, before horrific attacks by israel and hamas counterstrikes. My view as an uninformed viewer was that Israel acted far too strongly, i mean they are taking land masses that have no Israeli population at all. Water? Both sides did wrong.

Milutinović is aquitted of war crimes from the kosovo war.

North Korea have started tempting fate by messing around with nuclear weapons. Still i doubt America would bother invading again, despite the obvious hypocrasy.

Greenland flew solo from the Danites and got their own language Greenlandic.

The hadron collinder did not kill us all or work very well at all.

Astronomers found 32 new planets outside our solar system, one of which could support water.

Obama got a nobel peace prize (????????)

Red Dwarf got back on TV!

Notable deaths included:

J. G. Ballard - author of empire of the sun
Frank McCourt - author of angelas ashes + great book about being a young teacher 'teacher man'
Bobby Robson - football player/manager
Juan Almeida - Cuban revolutionary and vital black role model (in cuba)
Vic Chesnutt - Musican

I watched a lot of movies last year, i always forget films but here you go:
Best other film: You, the Living.
Best mainstream film: Avatar/Inglorious B.

Worst film: Star Trek (i like the star trek franchise, i did not like this pile of shite)

Best Tv Show - i liked the alice in wonderland mini from sci-fi. I liked Paradox (bbc) for a while. Chuck, i oddly enjoyed. Went through stages of watching black books, it crowd, fm with friends. Most surprisingly i found myself laughing at Seinfeld this year. Life and Times of Tim and Archer, were excellent animations.

Worst TV Show - i dislike so much, big bang theory is shite i really dont like that. Anything channel 4.

Music, i would say i only listened to about 100 albums this year which is low for me.
Portishead - Third, was awesome and nice and downbeat.
Vic Chesnutt - At the cut, i got this a few months before his death. A really miserable album and my cup of tea. He was a paraplegic and often wrote of death, there were some real harrowing songs on this one. His death was a result of an overdose.

Its pretty disgraceful how commercial this list is but hey ive no time to think.

My gran survived the year, thank the lord.

Heres some Vic Chesnutt to play us out.

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Sunday, December 13th, 2009
4:12 pm
Welcome to the voice' of America
Television dreams of love and chocolate
If you want, you can tell me on Friday.
I look in the mirror
And do not understand
What should I change.
We are self pain, hatred
We are the significant few
And the solecistic mass,
A mousetrap generation caught.

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